Thursday, September 1, 2011

A Little Honesty if You Will

I've been reflecting on my life a lot lately. Where I was in my life when I started this blog at the beginning of the summer, to where I am now are two completely different places. I would have never seen my summer unfolding the way it did, and flying by at the same time. I don't know if it's a thing that happens as we get older, but time literally feels like it's flying....and I don't like it! In less than a month I'm going to be turning 25. YIKES! If you were to ask me 10 years ago where I would be in my life by 25, I would easily tell you that I would have just gotten married and bought a house. I wanted to have a huge birthday party with all my friends and wear a fancy dress...and share every minute of it with my new husband. (gah I am such a romantic at heart....)

Well, things don't usually turn out the way you think they will. In fact, not only am I not a newlywed, but I am nowhere near that stage in my life. Part of me gets all sad and depressed when I think about that....but a bigger part of me realizes that I'm only turning 25 and there are so many opportunities out there for me. I'm young, single, and can do whatever I want! How amazing is that? It's definitely going to take some getting used to, not having to think or consider someone else's wants or needs, but I think this will be good for me to be able to focus on myself for awhile. What better time to do that than at 25?

Instead of thinking about the negative, I'm working on focusing on all of the positive things that I have in my life right now. I have the most amazing family a girl could ask for! I don't know many families that are as close as we are, and it's taken me a while to realize how awesome that is. My friends have been so wonderful and supportive and I truly do appreciate that. I don't know what I would do without any of them :) I have a pretty cool apartment that is all mine! My mom has always said that I need to enjoy living on my own before I get married so that I can decorate all girly. Cause let's be real, what man is going to want a pink bedroom? :) I have the absolute best little puppy in the entire world! I love him to death!! I honestly have no idea what I would do without him....and I have to admit that he has been the best company and has helped get me through a lot of hard times this summer. I'm thankful for knowing that God has a plan for my life, and that our plan isn't always what's best for us. I'm working on truly trusting and believing that, because I want to be happy again.

Now, this is not to say that life is coming up roses and I'm so truly happy with everything right now, because I'm not. I don't want this to sound like I'm super thrilled to be single...because I'm not. I still get sad just like anyone else, but I'm learning how to deal with it. I do know that everything happens for a reason, and I don't know why this one did just yet but one day I will. I'm actually realizing that I need to be happy with myself and my life before I can really find someone to share my life with. (See Mom & Dad....I listen!)

Fall is one of my favorite seasons. I love walking outside in the mornings and it being a little chilly, drinking cinnamon lattes, watching the leaves change, and of course, my favorite shows start back up again. It does make me a little sad, not having my partner in crime to do these things with anymore. I remember we would have our tv date nights (which ended up being almost every night of the week since we both liked different shows.) We would remind each other during the day what came on that night and make our dinner plans accordingly....which is so corny, I know, but that was one of my favorite things to do. Watching Parenthood, Modern Family, and Grey's won't be the same this year. :(

I was online the other day and found this quote that really stuck with me. It rings so true for just about everyone and I love it!

"The cause of most of man's unhappiness is sacrificing what he wants most for what he wants now."

This quote is a reminder that even though it hurts now, it will all be worth it for what I want forever. 

Sorry for the long, serious post before the weekend, but I just felt like I needed to get this out. 

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